Our latest issue is out and our cover boy Jack London took a lot of photos for our magazine that we couldnt put in it. Even some to show off his bottom surgery. Due to nudity we didnt feature in the magazine and they will be censored here. Click on the photos to see the uncensored. You have been warned! Click here to read the full magazine with Jack’s story inside.
Local libraries are doing a decent job of housing all types of publications for folks to peruse at their leisure but for an atmosphere of community I’d be hard pressed to find a better collection of literature than at my local LGBTQ community center. The Center here in Las Vegas has a specialized collection of literature for and by LGBTQI+ authors and a few days ago I found myself walking along the shelves looking for something to read.
Several covers later, one caught my eye because of its unusual title: Finding the Boyfriend Within—A Practical Guide for Tapping into Your Own Source of Love, Happiness, and Respect by Brad Gooch. Written in the late 1990s, the book served as an answer to gay cis men’s seemingly restless and unsatisfying search for the perfect boyfriend. Using the age-old advice that loving another requires loving oneself first, Gooch paints a detailed picture of what self-care looks like and how it thinks, as well as the tools to give you a better life of your own creation.
I can relate directly to this book, being gay myself, but his advice and perspective is universal. Just insert “girlfriend” or some other title in its place and you’ll see what I mean. Despite how hokey this title may seem to those who aren’t as in touch with their emotions, Finding the Boyfriend Within has plenty of insights that are worth reflecting on no matter who you are and whether you decide to use his many awareness exercises. Continue reading “You Are Not Who You Date: Self-Reliance and the Single Life” »
I was having an interesting conversation with some folks the other day, and it was suggested that those of us in the trans community should always remind people that we want a seat at the table when it comes to discussions with community leaders, or speaking at events. I’m not so sure i’m on the same page as them, so I thought i’d write this blog to discuss it, and possibly help me think the process through.
I’ve been an activist for over ten years, having dealt with nationwide leaders, local political officials, and other movers and shakers in the lgbt and non lgbt community. I’ve always made my voice perfectly clear, and at times had to demand people listen to how certain things affect or don’t affect the trans and gnc communities.
So, here’s where I’m kind of stuck. I’m not sure that having to remind people that Trans and Gender nonconforming people exist and want their voices heard should have to be a constant thing. There are decisions made everyday that affect the lives of those under the trans umbrella, and our opinions are never asked.
When we stand up and talk about what effects us, we’re told to quit victimizing ourselves…to do something about it…to affect change if we don’t like something. My question is this: do gay men and lesbians have to remind people they want their voices heard? Are we as a trans community ever going to have to stop being loud and crystal clear as to what our needs are?
There was an event recently where there was no trans representation from my local community, and when it was asked why there was no one trans to speak at this event, the answer was, “We didn’t think about it. No one from the trans community called and said they wanted to speak.” Why should we have to?
It says to me, very poignantly, that we always have to remind people to ask us to share our voices and our opinions. LBG organizations have often taken money and donations from non trans friendly organizations, and when this is pointed out, the answer is “Oh, I didn’t know.”
So now on top of having to constantly remind people to have trans and gnc folks actively participate in community discussions, we now have to remind them to ask places and people they take money from whether or not they’re trans friendly? I say no.
I say they have the responsibility to automatically ask how the business or person they’re taking money from affects change and actively supports the trans and gnc communities. I’m not talking about simply hanging the “T” at the end of the acronym and calling themselves inclusive.
According to a February 2015 publication called TransInformational Impact done by the Funders For LGBTQ Issues, the trans community receives .015 percent of foundation funding, which equals about a penny for every hundred dollars awarded.
We need more pennies obviously, but we also need for them to include us without having to constantly remind them that we even exist. We need to have a seat at the table when decisions are made for and about the trans and gnc communities. When we do ask to speak up for ourselves, we don’t need to be told that not everything is about the trans community, or that we’re being aggressive and demanding too much.
The opportunity to have our voices heard loud and clear is not too demanding; it is being equal. It is our equal right not to be “forgotten about” when LGB(T) organizations receive funds from sources that don’t include the diverse trans community. This type of trans exclusion is not ok, and it needs to be called out.
Accountability without compassion is an act of violence. And so is forgetting about or excluding the trans community. We shouldn’t have to be constantly begging to be included and actively involved in processes and discussions that impact our lives. We can and will always speak for ourselves, whether or not our voices are wanted or heard. That’s one thing that will never change.
Blue Montana is the Transgender Programs Manager at The Gay & Lesbian Community Center of Southern Nevada and a former Board Member at San Diego Pride. He studied LGBT Studies at San Diego State University. Now he lives in Las Vegas with his husband.
Tygh was a natural pick for our cover model for the DILF issue. In fact, he’s the reason the whole issue exists. We picked him before we picked the topic! Magazines may come and go–some before they even begin–but Tygh will long stand as role model and trans father figure for many FTMs. He is always putting out new videos, photos, and blogs (for our site now, too!)–he’s his own media institution, himself! When he signed at our table at the Philadelphia Trans Health Conference, tons of guys were coming up to meet him! But transitioning later in life has also come with a toll: a harsh rejection by his former social network. Read more about his transition from motherhood to fatherhood in our second issue!
Giovanni has two daughters, and he opens up about how transitioning has changed their relationships publicly and privately. He humbly reminds us not to underestimate how open children can be to a parent’s transition–e.g. they are not losing a mother, they are gaining a happier father. Check out his interview and pictures with his family in our DILF issue.
Mykel is Superman to his daughter, and that’s why he’s on it “24/7/365.” And she is, obviously, his queen: “It’s her world. I’m just living in it.” Read the advice he’s got for guys with kids who are considering transitioning in Issue 2.
Derek transitioned about three years after giving birth to his son. And it only took his son about 20 minutes to start calling him Daddy. Find out how Derek has made his son part of his journey in our latest issue!
Lucky you, we’ve got a bonus DILF for the blog only, FTM porn star, Matty Boi. Not only is he a sexy he’s rt throb, he’s also a daddy. And he just might be that other kind of Daddy too, but you’d have to check out his YouTube video with Ryan Cassata on BDSM to find out for sure! But we do know his favorite part of being a father:
“Do I really have to pick one?! That list is endless.
I absolutely love watching her express herself as her own person. Seeing her find passion in things and ALWAYS blowing me away with her talents and intelligence is an irreplaceable experience. (She is an incredible writer, watch out world!) Also, it’s amazing to look at your kid doing simple or huge things like school projects, moving up a grade, falling in love for the first time, or telling you about their plans for the future and go, ‘Holy shit, I helped that person become their own person.’ And let me tell you, she is an awesome person. I’m honored that I’ve been able to be a part of her life. She’s my heart and soul. I guess ultimately, she is my favorite part of being a dad. My favorite part is that I’m her dad.”
This Blog in particular is dedicated to us transguys. We are often the invisible, more silent, yet still harmed component of the transgender and gnc communities. When I heard about the death of Amos this past memorial day weekend, it got me thinking about the issues transmen face that aren’t often talked about. Everyone in the trans community faces much higher instances of discrimination in housing and work, we face stigmas that no one should ever have to face.
Transmen often blend into stealth lives and on with life we go. Homelessness is always to quick to rear its ugly head, which then puts us in unpredictable situations. I myself have struggled with being homeless more than once. Its not because I couldn’t get a job, I had one. I simply couldn’t work enough to live in a state that afforded me almost every protection and safety that could be offered to a trans identified individual. I had amazing health insurance, and protection from discrimination, and even the knowledge that I couldn’t be disrespected after I passed away and buried under my birth name in a dress thanks to Toni Atkins and the dignity after death bill she helped pass.
However, homelessness is one issue that isn’t being dealt with quick enough to stop transwomen and transmen from being sex workers to support themselves. No one should have to sell their body in order to have a roof over their head and eat, yet some do it everyday as a form of survival. Amos was homeless for reasons unknown to me, but what is known to me is that he struggled just as bad if not worse than all us us do, and being trans and homeless took his life. The disparity that regular society needs to recognize is prevalent now more than ever, and we are standing smack dab in the middle of our own civil rights movement, the right to exist.
For the month of February, we are celebrating the trans male country musician Jaimie Wilson. The son of a musician mother, Jaimie first started playing piano at the age of 4. When he was 16, he taught himself to play guitar in the matter of a few days, and began writing his own songs. Now at 20, Jaimie has played at venues around Ann Arbor, Michigan, as well as recorded his own album at Nickel City Studios in Nashville, Tennessee. Here are six reasons we love this country boy!
1. He performs a sweet, tender, and a little bit twangy rendition of Sam Smith’s “Stay with Me” that will give you chills.
2. He uses his Instagram @tboy61915 to document how hormone therapy has affected his singing voice.
“The question I get asked a lot by family members and friends is “why would you transition? You were able to sing so much better before T” and here’s my response: sure before my transition I know I could hit any high note there was, but that’s not what music is about to me. Now I can write about anything I want and sing about anything I want! Music is my therapy and my escape from this crazy life…it’s the last place I should make myself be someone I’m not! I couldn’t be happier performing as the most authentic me there is 😊 even if I can’t hit the notes I use to be able to…I’m happier and more comfortable than EVER!” –@tboy61915
3. He gives back to the FTM community by giving away a binder and/or packer each month. Enter to win by following, shouting out, and tagging @tboy61915.
4. He utilizes the new social media platform YouNow to interact in real time with fans, answering questions, and performing songs. You can catch his next broadcast on tboy61915.
5. He keeps it real.
“STOP ASKING WHAT’S IN MY PANTS | Everyday I receive messages asking invasive questions about what’s between my legs….why people? Why do you care so much about MY genitals!? I understand that these questions are mostly coming from people outside the transgender community…so they are not educated about these types of things and are just curious…but that’s what Google is for! Me nor my fellow brothers and sisters should ever have to deal with these types of questions. It should be common sense NOT to ask a complete stranger what their private parts consist of. You don’t see me asking what you got goin on down there. ✖️Genitals do not define gender✖️ ..end of rant.” –@tboy61915
6. He’s dreamy.
Want to know more about the handsome and talented Jaimie Wilson? You can also like him on Facebook at Jaimie Wilson Music and visit his website jamiewilsonmusic.net. Be sure to watch him perform more covers and original songs on his Youtube channel Jaimie Wilson Music. You can (like us) buy his two singles Driving Me Crazy and I’ll Stay There on iTunes. Look out for our exclusive interview with this emerging trans artist in our April 1st issue!
Let me start by saying I am a trans woman, and this is only my perspective from the outside looking in, as someone who works with and is friends with a lot of trans men. I honestly have no clue how long–and certainly not how many days–I have been on hormones. As a trans woman, I have never counted. In fact, I have never seen any other trans women count how long she has been on “E.” Most of the trans guys I know in real life do not count the days they have been on testosterone. My boyfriend is trans too, but the only time we talk about our shot is when laugh about how sometimes we each still manage to forget to do them. But when I started adding trans guys to my Facebook page, I really began to notice how many of them add videos, blog posts, or statuses discussing how long they have been on “T.”
At first, I kind of thought it was weird that none of the guys ever said how many months or years they were on T–only how many days–so the length of time tended to sound greater than it really was. The more I saw these types of status updates, the more I began to wonder why so many trans guys post how long they have been on hormones. Is it for self-gratification, or to boost one’s ego? Is it to validate who they are? Or, is it to compete with other trans men? Why don’t we see trans women documenting their transitions in similar ways? And, when does a trans person stop counting the days, and just start living as one’s authentic self of being a man? I really don’t know the answers to these questions, and every trans guy is different. I am only sharing my outsider perspective and opinion.
A few trans guys I’ve discussed this issue with say that at the beginning of their transition they were excited and counted the days, but after a year or so, most of them just started living their lives. I’ve also seen guys on social media post about shot days even three years later. Either way, I still love hearing how their testosterone shot made them feel different from the moment they first injected themselves. But for myself, I have taken hormones and never felt an instantaneous change. Maybe it’s because shots have never really phased me; the changes I notice from taking hormones are the long term ones, like softer skin or less body hair, as opposed to any immediate, psychosomatic benefits. What I mean is, I think what a lot of guys feel right after taking their shots is not a physical, but a mental, benefit of becoming the authentic self they were meant to be. I totally understand this excitement; I was excited early in my transition too. But what about those trans guys who don’t have a chance to be on hormones? They might see your counting and get jealous or upset with their own transition. Have you considered how what you post out of excitement might harm other men struggling with their own journeys?
So my main question to the trans guys out there is: when do you stop counting and just start focusing on living your life as men? When do you stop anticipating the next shot? When does it just become a normal thing in your life, like a person who has to take an insulin shot? Does the shot really make you a man? I don’t think it does. Yes, testosterone gives you the physical characteristics to appear like a man, but it doesn’t make you a man. You are a man within your soul. A shot does not make you more or less of a man. When is it time for you just to be you? You are a beautiful soul, and you are more than a shot, or a day on a calendar. Trans men are beautiful human beings, and the journey you guys go through is beautiful. The scars on your body are breathtaking because they tell me you went on a journey to become your authentic self. You worked hard to be that man, that beautiful man you are. I would love for you to just live your authentic self without a counter running on how many days you have been on testosterone, and to just be happy as the man you have always been. Be your true self because no number makes you more of a man, or less of a man.
photo via http://newsinteractive.post-gazette.com/longform/stories/identity/2/img/20140423MWHtransgenderAdvance21.jpg
Michelle Austin is an award winning performer, producer, director, speaker, and writer. She has been writing for trans publications for almost fifteen years. She is the Creative Editor of Transgentlemens Club, she is also the co-owner of Michelle Austin Films and Kennston Productions.
The very first issue of Transgentlemen’s Club magazine. An FTM sexuality and lifestyle magazine. In this issue get an in depth look into the rise of FTM porn from two of its biggest stars/producers DIcky Johnson and Cyd St. Vincent. Read personal stories of trans men transition in Mangina Monologues. See winter fashion spread from Ames Bexx. Get a personal look into the drag kings of LA as they launch a documentary. A sex toy review from Taylor J. Mace. MTF Spotlight on Her Story web-series.